THE AFRO-GERMAN MUSIC TRIFECTA

Until earlier this week, the trifecta was "in-play" and then I realized that NNEKA (kick ass word on scrabulous BTW) has officially scored the Afro-German Hat Trick.

I don't know what to make of this. I didn't know that Germany was a bastion of west African imports and I didn't know that Nigeria had any specific connection with Germany, but yet, it does.

First along came Patrice. Patrice started with serious reggae licks



and has recently moved on to...more reggae! But for the masses. Now with more German!



Next on the Afro-German circuit was AYO (who is the mother of Patrice's kid and his current bedmate) (in french no less!)



But...but...the trifecta needed its third wheel. And that's where Nneka comes in. I just happened onto her youtube videos (for some reason the repetitive beat is pleasing to me) and lo-and-behold she looks kinda like Ayo (same pale skin, same funky hair) and she's from Nigeria and she has some links to land of the Deutsch.




I don't know why this is weird to me...it just is. I just find it curious that there's these three [currently] popular singer being produced in Germany via Western Africa.

You can probably find better versions of all these songs on the youtubes, but I just want to take this opportunity to give a big "fuck you dickheads" shout out to the little pieces of dog-shit who disable embedding. You dumb motherfucker, you're trafficking in copyrighted material, yet you want to protect "your work." The irony will never leave me...never!

DRINKY DRINKY! HANSA PILS

As summer is [finally - at least in France] starting, it's time once against to half-ass some beer and various beverage reviews for your summer consumption. Now, don't get me wrong, it's not that I haven't been drinking, it's just that what I have been drinking hasn't been particularly blog-worthy: Pelforth, George Killian's Irish Red (which is completely different in Europe, our version hasn't been castrated by the Coors), Stella...average beers at best, but worse "supermarket beers." The way I figure it, if I can buy where they sell eggs and milk, it's not worth talking about.

I get to the beer store from time to time, but it's expensive and the selection isn't always great (although in their defense they do have 5 of 6 Belgium Trappist brands - will I ever get Westvleteren?) and it's out of the way. However, last week, with the Euro 2008 in high gear and France still having a chance at not totally sucking, we had a little Beer, Soccer & Pizza gathering. As this is France, normal "beer" would be some swill that August Busch IV wouldn't touch. So it falls on me, the only person in France (that I know) who cares about beer, to "take it up a notch": Direction V and B.

As previously mentioned, the beer's usually a bit pricey: around €2 per bottle (with certain Irish and British bottles going for over €3/each. This brings the [20 bottle] case price up to around €40. So I walk in and immediately see a big giant pile (stack if you prefer) of Hansa Pils for €16/case. Not having my handy list of "the best Deutsch beer" I figure what-the-fuck, for this price, I can't go wrong: Well, yes and no. First things, first: It's not terrible. It's not even as terrible as RateBeer (or the Beer Advocate) would have you believe, but it's not great either. Bitburger (the epitome of average German beer for me) gets a 2.9 on RateBeer. Hansa isn't worse than Bit is. Bit may be easier to drink, but Hansa is fine if you're looking for an easy-drinking brew on a hot day.

One of the criticisms on RB is that it has a tinny, thin head. Well, the trick is not to pour it like a beer, but instead pour the last 1/3 like soda - straight down into the glass...Then you get a beautiful (if extremely temporary) fluffy white head. Beyond that, the taste is quite dry and just a tad sour. The mouthfeel is...Ok, I still don't know what that means, but I still love the word. All in all a great deal at 80 cent a bottle, but it would be a horrible deal at twice that.

I'm going to try to be a better client of the beer store and spend more time writing Drinky Drinky columns. I urge the other contributors of this blog to as well. The single most important factor to our readers (beyond the cynicism, hate and women without pants) is alcohol reviews.

DRINKY DRINKY: JEVER PILSNER

Really quick review, since it's Friday night and I've got more beer to drink.

Interesting tasting pilsner. It's too cold here to truly appreciate it, but that's not a problem: I've turned the heat up to 95 degrees to imagine that I'm basking in the sun on a summer's day instead of the reality of being a virtual shut-in because of the fucking rain.

This beer has a smoky taste to it that I can't really define. It's crisper than I thought it would be and a bit dry, but there's a [not completely unpleasant] taste that I've never recognized in a beer before, maybe it's herb because all of the reviews I read say it has an herby taste and I know fuck-all about reviewing alcohol. I'm limited to: Did I manage to drink it all? Check! Did it make me feel good? Check! Was I sick the next morning? No! Perfect.

I read a review that said Pilsner Urquell is better. I don't know. Pilsner Urquell is probably easier to drink/less complex, but Jever definitely deserves your time, if you're in a beer store or a bar, that has it. That's as good of a review as this brew's going to get. Taste it if you can. If not, meh. There are better Germans out there (allegedly there is beer in that picture, who knew?).