ODE TO THE THIRD

There's been a lotta talk about this next topic, maybe...maybe, too much talk:

[This article is going to be hampered by the fact that the Excellent Puck Daddy Yahoo! Hockey Blog has the worst ever search engine, but anyway...]

Hockey's third jerseys (which I guess affects other US-based sports too, but really who cares about them) have been getting all kinds of bad press about the money-grabbingness of them. Yes, my friends, it is a money grab, but I find it better than the $8 beer or the $5 pretzel (or the hashed horse meat that they used to serve at the "Continental Airlines Arena & Superfund Site" for $8).

Number one, let me clear the air and say, as a Sabres fan, I applaud any and all efforts that lead to the extinction of the Buffaslug. The Sabres' new third is a perfect homage to the past, while remaining cutting-edge, 21st century cool. But that's not why I write this:

Those people who claim that the new third is a money grab are obviously bleeding heart liberals who think that we should protect everyone from themselves by outlawing "fun." When was the last time you entered your local NHL arena and had an usher point a gun at your head and say "buy a different jersey." Fuck that. You have the choice if you want to buy it or not.

The new Sabres third will probably sell great because it's what the fans want. Some of those Southern teams are putting out shit jerseys for shit teams, and you know what, if some 'Canes fan has to buy it because "he needs to have it" well then, good for him. That's obviously $90 less that he'll spend on crystal meth and an alley-abortion for his underaged girlfriend. The rest of us will make our own decisions.

I've lived in Europe for the last 5 years and the soccer (football) clubs here change jerseys every year, then they have 3rd, 4th, 12th jerseys too. I actually find it cool. It allows teams to do one-offs (or for a couple of games) something that they wouldn't usually do. Last night Olympique Lyon played a Champions League match against Bayern Munich. They wore day-glo yellow jerseys. Don't get me wrong, it was hideous, but it was different too. Different is good, IMHO, even if it sucks.

The infamous Blues jersey? I like the principle, of course it is horrible (although the thought of pictures of Chris Pronger in that...hah!), but it was still awesome that someone would make this into a jersey. I like the "fallopian tubes" Stars jersey. Damn it, it shows fucking creativity, something that is horribly lacking in Bettman's league of horrors.

Anyway, all you whining liberals out there. Stop worrying about other people's money and start worrying about what type of gun Sarah Palin is carrying right now. You know she's thinking about it.