SUMMER BUMMER

Now that we've got the serious political discussion out of the way . . .



It's June, and you know what that means--heat rash, West Nile virus, and a slew of summer movie blockbusters! You know how I feel about "Star Wars", but surprise, surprise, it's not the only tired-ass idea being flogged this season. Take a look at the unoriginal garbage masquerading itself as "entertainment" this year. Let slip the dogs of crap!

"The Longest Yard"
"Dukes of Hazzard"
"Bad News Bears"
"Bewitched"
"The Pink Panther"
"Herbie: Fully Loaded"
"Charlie and the Chocolate Factory"
"The Honeymooners"
"War of the Worlds"

Wonderful! I've already seen all of these, so this saves me loads of time! This allows me to play golf and spend some time OUTDOORS this summer, instead of paying $11 to sit in a dark room stuck to the floor (which I can do at home for free). Okay, I technically haven't seen "Batman Begins", but all that will do is kill the lead actor's career for years to come (Christian Bale, allow me to introduce you to Val Kilmer, George Clooney and Michael Keaton). And the last movie there is a Spielberg/Cruise vehicle, but this time I just don't feel like getting behind the wheel. Meh.

Oh, I forgot to mention "Deuce Bigalow: European Gigolo", but I figured it needed its own paragraph. That's right, someone green lighted this sequel. I'll just let that sink in. There. You may start screaming.

(I don't really care about this stuff, I just wanted that hideous picture and headline off the top of the blog--thanks Kris!)

Just forget these movies and go buy MST3K Volume 7, featuring:

Episode 407- THE KILLER SHREWS (with short: JUNIOR RODEO DAREDEVILS)
Episode 408- HERCULES UNCHAINED
Episode 410- HERCULES AGAINST THE MOON MEN
Episode 816- PRINCE OF SPACE (with bonus shorts: ASSIGNMENT VENEZUELA, CENTURY 21 CALLING and A CASE OF SPRING FEVER)

GYMKATA!