WRIST SHOTS: BEASTS OF THE EAST

The Prince Of Wales [Eastern] Conference final four are set: Devils vs. Senators, and Sabres vs. Rangers. The Devils looked solid finishing off TB in 6 (bye bye, Tortorella!), but I fear they will have more trouble with Ottawa. Of course, I picked the Sens to lose in the first round . . .

Some other quick notes:

• Detroit finally finished off the Flames, winning 2-1 last night in 2 OT despite 53 saves by Kiprusoff--sweet Jebus, does Calgary have ANY DEFENSE??? In my opinion they deserved to lose after their garbage-time douchebaggery in Game 5 on Saturday (just like with Tortorella's team, they totally lost my respect). Maybe the fans were right, and ironically named Calgary coach Jim Playfair should have been fired after Game 2.

• Someone (besides me, I know it's hard to believe) came up with a NHL Stanley Cup playoffs drinking game. The best one is: "Ryan Miller makes a save look harder than it is". Man, he does this a lot. I hold my liquor pretty well, but even I can't drink that much. The coach part is funny too, especially the "Tortorella smiles sarcastically". Well, not any more, unless it's on the golf course.

• I love how the most boring series, between two teams that have no offense, has become "the best goalie battle in years!" (VANDAL). Regardless, it's the only remaining game in the first round, as well as the only Game 7, and it's in Vancouver so it should be fun to watch (too bad it's on at 9 PM).

• I'm already sick of Brett Hull on NBC, he's horrible. It seems like every time he says something the other guys don't know how to react, as his comments are either sarcastic or just plain incongruous. The whole '30 Rock' booth is completely awkward, and Bill "Clement Clement Hands of Cement" surely doesn't help things. And just like there are no ties in hockey, Ray "Chicken Parm" Ferraro's ties also have to go. ZING!

• NHL.com has decided that one of the top 5 most important articles on their website is what Edge thinks of the Devils chances in the playoffs. He even took time out from his European tour with U2 to comment . . . oh wait, it's not the guitarist, but the WWE wrestler. Either way, NHL Connect, which is trying hard to be a Myspace-like "networking" site, is pretty awful. However, I did find Christie Brinkley's site, where she claims to be a 17 year old from Pacific Palisades, CA--yeah right! That's what I've been claiming too! But here's the hands-down worst "profile" on the whole site: THE STANLEY CUP.

Stanley Cup
Location: TORONTO, ON
Gender: Male
Age: 114
Favorite NHL team: Undecided
Favorite player(s): All of them, past and present
Favorite sports/teams: The NHL, of course!
Music: "The Good Old Hockey Game, " By Stompin' Tom Connors
Books: The Official NHL Guide and Record Book
Movies: Anything with hockey: Miracle on Ice, Slap Shot, Mystery Alaska, Youngblood....

Profile
Bonjour! Hello! My name is Stanley, and I’m the oldest trophy in North American professional sports. I was born in England, but now I live in Toronto, Canada. Oh, and I love hockey! I've probably seen more games than anyone else on this board. If you have a hockey question, feel free to drop me a line below or at stanleycup@nhl.com

Ha ha, Youngblood! He's also lying about his age, didn't he just turn 115 in March? I sure hope Mr. Cup adds me to his list of friends.