ANOTHER NHL UPDATE: DEVILS DOG BLUE SHIRTS

The Devils scored on their first shift, and their first shot, only 68 seconds into Game 3 @ MSG last night and never looked back, beating #68 & Co. 3-0, to take a 3-games-to-none stranglehold on this series. Unfortunately for the Rangers, they've just run into a buzzsaw. Plus, they had Henrik saying he "wasn't seeing the puck" lately (which is pretty much the primary job of a goalie), Ozolinsh who can't stop screwing up (the "Ozolinsh Mob" at MSG weren't booing him each time he touched the puck, they were saying "Boo-ozolinsh"), Rucinsky fitted with a bent piece of PVC tubing on his thumb so he could play (I'm not kidding), and an ineffective Jagr skating with a newly fitted bionic arm that malfunctioned and tried to kill its maker (could be true). Jags certainly couldn't shoot the puck with his dislocated shoulder, so he was out there for inspirational purposes only, which didn't light a fire under the team. Overall, it hasn't been a good showing for this talented, young crew.

On the other hand, this is the Devils 14th win in a row, and Brodeur's 21st playoff shutout, both of which are pretty damn impressive numbers. You have to hand it to Lou for letting these guys loose on offense; ever since Elias came back in January it's been working fantastically (this isn't your old "boring neutral zone trap team", so you can stop calling the sports radio ass-clowns and complaining about it). As you may know, I want the Devils to win and I'm enjoying this, but in all honesty I was hoping for a long, hard-fought series. It actually got people in this "huge sports town" talking about hockey again for the first time in 9 years, and now we've already moved on to talking about the whothefuckcares NFL draft (which is, by definition, a discussion for LOSERS). Ugh. Oh well.

During the postgame show, Ken Daneyko, while plugging some gym that he opened in Hoboken, joked about who the Devils are going to play in the next round. So if they pull an '04 Yanks and lose this series, it will officially be known as "The Curse of Ken" or "The Daneykurse" (I can't decide). Game 4 will be played in the Self-Proclaimed World's Most Famous Arena on Saturday afternoon at 3PM, which I have decided is the worst time to attend (and watch) a game. It's especially shitty if you're in the Swamp, and it's raining so you can't even tailgate; on the other hand, it's perfect if you're in Manhattan if you have dinner reservations after the game. Okay, so being in New Jersey is the part that sucks.

Colorado won in OT last night (I saw the tying goal with under a minute left, but missed the Alex "Tanqueray Time" winner a minute into OT), and they're now up 3-0 in the series vs. the Stars, giving Marty Turco a 1-8 record in the playoffs. Philly phinally beat Buffalo, and it was as ugly as Brind'Amour but Carolina won 2-1 to finally show up in this series.

(Why have I started writing about the Stanley Cup playoffs on a daily basis, since I'm the only one who cares? I don't know. Unless someone leaves a comment saying that I should continue this nonsense, I'm going to stop blogging about this stuff for a while, because I'm boring myself. We need more comedy, and this is funny, but not "ha ha funny".)

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Speaking of a lack of comedy, a personal note to Robin Williams: it's over. You had a nice run, winning an Oscar for "Good Will Hunting", being nominated for "Good Morning Vietnam" (and possibly other movies with "good" in the title), and doing some of the best cocaine-fueled work in the 80s, outside of Lawrence Taylor. But with the release of RV, a comedy whose piece de resistance is an exploding toilet, I think it's time to revoke your SAG card. Plus, you're dragging down funny actors like Cheryl Hines and Will Arnett, who have starred in some of the best TV comedies from the past few years. But hey, it's been fun, really. Good night, Vietnam! This is Mork from Ork signing off, nanu, nanu!