THE HANGOVER BOWL

Over the past 11 days of holiday/vacation time, I couldn't figure out a way to stay home and still pay the bills, so unfortunately I'm at work today. If I've learned nothing else from 2006, it's that I need to marry a woman who has a steady job so I can quit mine. Thanks Kris, and Scott! So I'm off to the search the Interwebs for my hardworking Russian bride!

First, this from the "Not Really As Good As It Sounds" file: Cablevision added two HD channels yesterday. However, they are YES-HD (which was already on there showing Nets games, just not 24 hours a day) and SNY-HD (which they already had part time). Basically, they're two networks that have very little HD content until April 1st, and even then it's only during a live game broadcast. Way to go! Thanks, jerks. Where is DiscoveryHD? Or ESPN2-HD? I cannot wait to dump CV.

Speaking of cable TV jerks, the 50 Greatest MSG Moments list, which they seem to be counting down over a period of 50 weeks, is dead to me. Why, you ask? Because #44 was "The Debut of the New York Liberty". I can't take any list seriously that has that on it. I also read somewhere that 23 of the 50 MSG moments involve the Knicks/Rangers. Since they're showing this list at their busiest time of the programming year (and not the summer, when they've got nothing else to show), it's basically just a long series of ads to try and get more people to watch the games on MSG. And I can understand Elvis and Marilyn Monroe, but Billy Freaking Joel made the Top 50? Bah. What about that Devils/Rangers game where Karl surprised me and bought 2nd row seats? That was WAY better. That's in my 50 BEST DAMN MSG MOMENTS, along with that Peter Gabriel "Secret World" concert and the Harlem Globetrotters in 1977. Though, the list would be hard for me since I don't even think I've been there 50 times. Anyway, I'm so sick of lists.

For a true nostalgia countdown, NFL Network is showing the original unedited network broadcasts of all 40 Super Bowls this month. Without all the commercials, analysis, concerts and associated garbage we've come to expect, Super Bowl III is probably and hour and a half long. Once again, I don't have this channel, so let me repeat: SCREW CV.

Speaking of countdowns (I'm on fire with the segues today), I think Dick Clark needs to quit the ABC Rockin' Eve show. He counted down from 20 along with the New Years Eve crowd in Times Square, and even skipping "10" he was a full second behind and couldn't keep up. It's sad, he sounds like he's in bad shape. We love you, Dick, but you seriously need to retire. Hey, it's been a great 58 years doing that job, though. I think it's time to pass the torch to Univision's "Feliz 2007"--those people truly looked like they were having the funnest feliz of them all.

In closing: how great is "The Honeymooners" marathon on New Years Day? "THAT'S 'Swanee River'???"