I WILL NOT BE RUNNING IN 2008

Hello America!

I wanted to take this opportunity to declare that I will not be running in 2008. As others have already stated their intentions, I thought it was only fair to inform the American people of my wishes. Running is not something that I have seriously considered, although I may have threatened to do so in the past. Although I frequently go for jogs/walks (more of a "wog", really), I certainly would not call it 'running'. Running takes a lot of motivation and effort, and it's very hard on the knees. As a tall person, it's just not something that I'm well suited for and thus I don't intend to run this year or in 2008.

I was just informed that Kerry announced he was not running FOR PRESIDENT in 2008. Sorry, I missed that little bit of information. (Did we expect him to run? Did we even ask him to?) Well, that changes things a bit.

Regardless, I may as well use this space to also say that I will not be running, for President or otherwise, in 2008. It was a decision that I thought long and hard about over the past several minutes, a decision that did not come easy. I admit that many tears, and clothes, were shed during this time of reflection. I want to thank all my supporters and my family for standing behind me, even though you may have been making faces back there that I couldn't see. Thank you.

Speaking of thanks, it bugs me that some people don't say 'thanks' when you hold the door for them. It's not like I want them to tip me. I'm not asking for much. I say it all the time when people hold the door for me. Well, usually I say 'thanks' at the first set of doors, but if there's a second set I usually mumble so that you only hear the sibilants, and it ends up sounding more like 'kssss'. It's certainly close enough, and I'm sure the door holder gets the idea and isn't offended. But I digress.

In closing, I just wanted to state my intentions without being misleading, deceptive or vague. I also do not wish to be redundant, repetitive, or reiterative. Basically, I will not be running in 2008.

Thank you.