Tuesday, April 15, 2008


"between 0000-00-00 and 9999-99-99"

This cryptic message has been showing up at the tail end of everyone's emails using the Yahoo! Mail service today. I have no idea what it means, but it looks like a date format to me. Since normally there's an ad for some various Yahoo! service in that place, I'm guessing that has to do with the dates the ad is supposed to run.

Not satisfied with my own conclusion, I decided to search the trusty World Web WebberNets and The Goog. My search for the answer just served to illustrate to me the uselessness of the ironically named Yahoo! Answers website. Jeepers, the moronic posts that people put up there simply boggle the mind, and virtually none of them are a correct answer or even the slightest bit helpful. Oh, and if you don't have the answer DON'T POST NONSENSE TO WASTE EVERYONE'S TIME. This goes for people who say, "Yeah, I'm having the problem too" or "Maybe it's an error." Maybe? That's your answer? MAYBE?

Some people have said it's a social security number, but it's not the right format (000-00-0002: damn you, Roosevelt). Others have assumed it has something to do with tax day, but what exactly? All I know is those two answers above were the most intelligent I found. Maybe "0000-00-00" means "rock" and "9999-99-99" means "hard place", which is as good as any answer on this pointless site.

In other words, Yahoo! Answers should really be called "Yahoo! Wild Speculations With No Basis In Fact". (Don't even get me started about subjective questions posited on the site, like "Is A-Rod the best baseball player ever?" which has no definitive answer.) And there's always some smartass whose solution to the problem is "Stop sending emails". I want to virtually slap your dumb looking avatar's face, you cyberdouche.

Here's the real reason: it's an SQL bug caused by someone inputting the dates of the Yahoo! ad incorrectly. Which brings me back to my original conclusion. What a waste of time. Thanks, Internet!

Here are some other open burning questions on Yahoo! Answers, with my astute (and correct) answers:

Q. Help! I'm italian....?
A: That's your parents' fault.

Q. Would you like to help me plz : )?
A. No thanks.

Q. Why do you think Jesus Christ went back to Heaven rather than staying here on Earth?
A. He couldn't find any parking spaces.

Q. Whats the best metal Magazine?
A. Practical Welding Today is my favorite, though you can't go wrong with any of the ASM Technical Journals like Metallurgical and Material Transactions and Alloy Digest.

Q. Dry, Red Patches on Face?
A. No I don't have any, but thanks for asking.

Q. What are your?
A. Mine are.

Q. ???????????
A. !!!!!!!!!!!

Q. puck bunny?

A. Yes, please!

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